It is Jesus.

Daughter, Bride, Temple.

2011-09-07T06:12:00.000-07:00

Just what is an identity?

When you enroll in classes in college, you become a college student. On your wedding day, you take on a new role as a spouse. When you have a child, you become a parent. Maybe you see your identity as "employed" or "unemployed", "friend" or "loner", "reader" or "musician", "introverted" or "extroverted". We label ourselves and give ourselves identities or the outside world does. Some identities you have no control over. When you're born into a family, you immediately become a daughter or son, and perhaps a sibling.

But here’s the real question I want to get at, what does God say about identity? The Bible tells us God has many identities - Father, Counselor, Lord (Master), Savior, etc. So by telling me who He is, in response He tells me who I am. As I took a walk by myself the other night, I thought of three identities He has given me that really change everything. They tell me that He loves me. They tell me I am taken care of. They tell me I am always at home with Him. They tell me I am never alone. Though I may often forget these things, that does not make these identities untrue. They unfold from His trinitarian nature. Let me explain -

1. Because God is my Father, I am His daughter.

John 1:12 But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God,

Galatians 3:26 for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.

Romans 8:15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

2 Corinthians 6:18 and I will be a father to you,
and you shall be sons and daughters to me,
says the Lord Almighty.”

So He provides for me, takes care of me emotionally, and protects me.

2. Because Jesus is my Bridegroom, I am a bride.

Hosea 2:16 “And in that day, declares the Lord, you will call me ‘My Husband,’ and no longer will you call me ‘My Baal.’

Ephesians 5:25-26, 31-32: Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ... “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.

Revelation 19:7-9 Let us rejoice and exult
and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and his Bride has made herself ready;
8 it was granted her to clothe herself
with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.9 And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.”

So He has made an eternal covenant with me, knows me, and loves me passionately.

3. Because the Holy Spirit dwells within me, I am His temple.

Galatians 4:6 And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!”

John 14:26-28a 26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. 28 You heard me say to you, ‘I am going away, and I will come to you.’

1 Corinthians 6:19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

So He is always with me, makes me capable of obeying Him, and brings me peace.

Our God is bigger than we will ever understand; it took him 66 books to explain Himself, what He has done for us, and how He feels about us. He is far more than what I have written above, but He is very much those things above. In the same way, we are far more than what I have written above, but we are very much those things above.

Today I am so thankful that grace upon grace is mine because of God's fullness. I am His daughter, His bride, and His temple. I am protected, loved, and never alone. Though I know I am unworthy of such love, He deems me worthy, so I will choose to revel in the beauty that has become mine.

The Gospel is Everywhere - Sean McConnell

2011-05-12T09:14:00.000-07:00

Last night as I sat in the dimly lit Melting Point in Athens surrounded by some wonderful friends, I experienced what I've heard called a gospel moment. What exactly is a gospel moment? I think it's when you become astounded, if only for an instant, by the beauty of God's plan of redemption. When you realize the beauty of God's original intention for His creation. When you encounter something so harmonious, or gracious, or majestic that you are convinced again that God is good. In case a definition of the gospel is needed, here is Webster's definition:

gospel |ˈgäspəl|1 the teaching or revelation of Christ : it is the Church's mission to preach the gospel.• (also gospel truth) a thing that is absolutely true : they say it's sold out, but don't take that as gospel.
And if you want one from Scripture, Romans 1:16; 3:22-24, "For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes - the Jew first and also the Gentile . . . We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who we are. For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard. Yet God, with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins." (I am also not ashamed that this is from the NLT version).
So the gospel, in a nutshell, is that we are declared righteous through Jesus' death and resurrection though we don't deserve it. But the thing is, the gospel really can't be explained in a nutshell. A wise man at my church once said it only takes about 3 chapters in Genesis to realize how screwed up humankind is, and it takes the rest of the 66 books to describe God's love for them. And God has also revealed Himself in every facet of His creation. So as I see the gospel played out on this earth, I want to write about it. Without further adieu - a brief description of my gospel moment with Sean McConnell.

Sean and his pianist walked onstage and began playing the most beautiful song I may have ever heard. I was lost in the experience; I can't even tell you the exact lyrics. It was something about Praise Be to God. But what really spoke to me was the way the melody and harmony blended together. Their voices were enough to melt me. The strum of the guitar mixed with the jazzy piano was mesmerizing. The rhythm of it all kept perfect time. I couldn't help but think that this is what heaven's music will sound like. There was a peace and a harmony in the way it all worked together to create a beautiful sound. Surely this is a reflection of God's intention for creation. Peace, harmony, melody, beauty.
If you compared the world to a mirror, it has been broken (not shattered) by sin, so the reflection of God is cracked and tainted. But it can still be seen. And I am convinced that in the songs of Sean McConnell, a glimpse of who God is shines through. At least that's what happened for me last night.

This video isn't the greatest quality, but this was one of my favorites of his last night: A Prayer You Can Borrow.
More gospel moments to come I'm sure.

Revolutionary Friends.

2011-03-05T22:39:00.000-08:00

I just want to say real quick, I have revolutionary friends.

I’ve known this for a couple years now. There was one day I was sitting back and reflecting on the beautiful gift of friendship the Lord has graced me with and it hit me. Not only are my friends wonderful people, they’re going to change things. They’re going to change this world for the better. In many ways they already have.

I looked up the definition of revolution. It reads: ‘a dramatic and wide-reaching change in the way something works or is organized or in people's ideas about it.’ I love that. A dramatic and wide-reaching change. The internet has revolutionized the way people gather information, Facebook has revolutionized the way we communicate and Apple has revolutionized - in their own words - everything. Everything technology anyway.

But I think these people I keep mentioning are going to revolutionize the world in a different way. They’re going to change it in the name of Jesus. They’re going to change it through love. I used to like the mental image of the Lord bringing people at UGA together in Athens for a short period of time to learn from each other and love each other, then literally scattering across the nations to proclaim His name. It’s beginning to happen. They’re spread across Georgia, North Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Louisiana, Colorado, California, Washington, The Gambia, Switzerland, Bolivia. Then there are the friends I know from other walks of life in Fayetteville, Chicago, Virginia, Florida, Indiana, Honduras, Peru, Germany, some soon to be traveling to Columbia and Zambia. They’re taking mission trips to Watoto and Scotland and Israel this summer.

Forgive me if there are places/people I forgot to mention here. And I couldn’t count on my fingers and toes the number of people I still know in this city that are changing it as they die to themselves and live for the King of the Universe, including four beautiful women I share a home with.

Maybe I’m bragging - but I’m bragging on them. Their friendship is a gift to me, not something I’ve earned. And they’re going to shine light in the dark places on this earth in Jesus’ name. I think so highly of them. I’m so thankful for them. And I’m beyond pumped to watch their lives unfold.

Love changes things. Grace makes life beautiful. They’ll be bringing both from the original source to the ends of the earth.

We don't fully understand love.

2011-02-19T13:16:00.000-08:00

So, I'm a thinker. I'm not void of emotions; I actually feel a lot. But I am always thinking. Unfortunately, my thoughts are hardly ever linear. For this reason, I have a hard time explaining my thoughts to others, and I have a hard time coming to conclusions. This whole concept that I'm about to write about has been mulling around in my head for weeks, maybe months. Finally, talking this through with Paige the other day helped me organize my thoughts. She does that for me often.

I'm not exactly sure what this idea is supposed to do for you, or for me. Maybe this is just to convince us that His ways really are higher than ours, and His thoughts higher than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9). Maybe it's to help explain this crazy world and how a loving God could be in charge of it all. Heck, maybe I'm wrong about this whole thing. (I told you I was bad about coming to conclusions). But over and over again, I keep coming back to that love is what this world is all about, what our God is all about. So naturally, it's always on my mind ....

We don’t fully understand love.

Here’s why I say this:

We like love from our significant others or friends because it feels good. It’s attractive to us.

We like love from our parents when it’s providing for us. But we don’t like love from our parents when it’s telling us what to do. We rebel against its authority. It doesn’t feel as good when it tells us we’re doing things wrong, even though that’s exactly what parents are commanded to do (Proverbs 22:6).

We want love to always feel good. We mistake love always being affirming and kind for always giving us what we want. That is not love. Love shouldn’t propel us towards selfishness, because selfishness is not best for us. Being loved tempts us to hoard it when it should prompt us to give our lives away to love others.

Romans 13:10 is my favorite definition of love. ‘Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of the law.’ Bam. Since God is love (1 John 4:8), He does no wrong to us. He does not wrong us. And since Jesus fulfilled the requirements of the law for us (because we cannot), He is love. [By the way, the second half of the verse shouldn’t be that shocking, since Jesus Himself said all the commandments could be summed up by loving God and loving people - Matthew 22:37-40. Also check Romans 13:8-9.]

Sometimes, love needs to tell us we’re an idiot. In order to love Job, God needed to put him in his place (Job 38). In order to love Jonah (and the Ninevites), God needed to put him in a whale (Jonah 1:17). He also tells Jonah he’s being a whiner later in the book (Jonah 4). In order to love Joseph, God allowed him to be put in a pit (Genesis 37:23, 50:20). In order to love King David, God punishes him for adultery (2 Samuel 12:7-18). Note that God did not punish him forever; He soon blessed David with another child because He loved him (2 Samuel 12:24-25). In order to love Ruth, God let her first husband die, then later sends her a kinsman-redeemer (Ruth 1:3-4, Ruth 4:13-14). In order to love Paul, God put a thorn in his side (2 Corinthians 12:6-10). In order to love the world, God sacrificed His Son (John 3:16). In that moment, I don’t believe love felt good to God. What a sacrifice - to let His Son suffer so that He could have us, too.

How sweet is it that God’s love encompasses all types. He is our Father (1 John 3:1), and He disciplines those He loves (Hebrews 12:6, Revelation 3:19). He calls Himself our friend - our loyal, constant, encouraging friend (Isaiah 41:8, John 15:13,15). He calls Himself our lover (Hosea 2:16, Song of Solomon) - our intimate, faithful, passionate lover. So He is always for us (Romans 8:28-32), and He does no wrong to us (Romans 13:10); it’s us who doesn’t understand what’s best for us. I heard someone say once that God knows how to love us better than we know how to love ourselves. Our self-love is all about me, and that’s not actually what’s best for us. What’s best for us is making our lives all about the Perfect God of the Universe - in other words, accepting and reflecting His love to the world around us.

And I have to mention my favorite part of the virtue love - it never fails. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:8). Hallelujah. These promises of His love stand forever. Forever. Till the end of time.

We will never love perfectly. I think that’s why we have such a hard time understanding love, because everyone on this earth perverts love in some way, even with the best intentions. But we cannot say that he/she/He does not love me just because it doesn’t feel good at the moment. That is a very shallow understanding of the word love. A lot of times love does feel good, but not always. So will you trust God that He is doing what is best for you - whether it’s rebuking, correcting, encouraging or blessing? He does each of these not to tear us down or make us weak, but to build us up in Himself.

We don’t fully understand love. If we did, we would fully understand God. And who is ready to claim that?

You resonate in the ever-changing me.

2010-11-30T06:44:00.000-08:00

My original title for this entire blog was, “It was Jesus but she did not recognize him.” That came from a life-changing moment in my tiny room in Club Fitty when I was begging to hear the Lord’s voice. I didn’t know His voice, or so I thought. John 20:15 came to mind randomly, so not knowing what the verse said, I semi-skeptically looked it up. I was shocked. The title comes from the end of verse 14. He was telling me He was there with me, I just wasn’t recognizing His voice. That day I surely did.

I love that. I would venture to say that Jesus is always right with us, we just fail to recognize him. Maybe we’re not looking. Maybe we are and still can’t seem to find him. But I am 100% confident that when we seek Him, we will eventually find Him, our just and lovely Savior [Jeremiah 29:13, Matthew 7:7]. So don’t give up.

But now I really wanted to change things up on here. You might not care, but this is my little corner of cyberspace and I want to take care of it :) I’m changing the title because I find myself changing in so many ways. Maybe you don’t notice, or haven’t noticed, but I know. So the new title ....

You resonate in the ever-changing me.

Two reasons why:

1. I feel like I’m always changing, and I see it as a positive thing. I look back at the me in high school and wonder who that girl was. I look back at the me a year ago and wonder why any of my roommates liked me. I look back at the me three months ago and feel like I’ve grown ten-fold. I think it has something to do with grace. Okay I’m lying, I know it has everything to do with grace.

You see, there’s something in my personality that always yearns for more. Why would I ever stay the same when I know there is so much more I could be? There’s always something else to learn, to implement, to enjoy. I don’t know why this is, but I always want to be like this. I always want to yearn to know more about the God who created me and loves me and then show the world.

2. Resonate. Mmm, how I love that word. Webster’s definition of this word is to produce or be filled with a deep, full, reverberating sound. There is something so great about this to me. When something resonates with me, it touches my soul. Music can do this, love can do this, emotion can do this, truth can do this. The “You” in my title is Jehovah, the same God yesterday, today and forever. He resonates in the ever-changing me. He is the reason for change. Anything good in me is from Him. He resonates in me because He lives in me, and it is undeserved. Hallelujah.

Yahweh, Yahweh, great is Your glory, You go before me. Oh we sing, holy, holy, Your ways are lovely, so high above me. - Needtobreathe.

This feels right.

2010-11-08T10:51:00.000-08:00

Somewhere in the land of cyberspace, my beautiful roommate Christine Kaufman has written a similar blog post. But since I cannot find said blog post, I wanted to write my own thoughts on a subject that has become a buzzword in our household and among friends. You can’t live without it; you must live by it. Without it, your actions seem wayward and meaningless. It’s an explanation for all your actions, or at least it should be. It can help you make major life decisions. It’s a life motto.

Now before you write life mottos off like some sort of new years resolution you never stick to, hear me out. We take these very seriously, as you will soon see. Here’s a taste of a few ....

I’ll start with my own, that only seems fair. If you know me, you may have heard me say this once or a thousand times. “If it feels right, do it.” This is a branch and tiny expansion of my response to the constant question, “Why’d you do that, Rae?” It felt right! Now this statement requires a strong moral compass and ethical values, neither of which I have. I’m kidding - sorta. This life motto is neither godly nor super inspiring. I could’ve chosen the golden rule, something about it being more blessed to give than receive, or live like you’re going to die tomorrow. Whatever. I like mine. I live by it, and it hasn’t failed me yet. Yet. Or has it?

“If you feel it, do it. / Do what you feel.” by the wonderful Katuschka Rakovec. It may seem slightly similar to mine at first glance, but this life motto fully captures who she is. If you feel something, do it. And do it like you feel it! Don’t hide. Don’t be fearful. Show your emotion. Do it big. Be passionate! If you need an example of how to do this, just watch her.

“Fake it till you make it.” by the great and brilliant Jonathan Janos. I really like this one. How many of us feel this way? Like we’re faking it all the time - we’re not that confident in what we’re doing. But if we can make people believe that we are, maybe, just maybe, we’ll make it. You may hate this one. I think it’s hilarious. Jonathan is on his way to Germany to serve us as an engineer in the army for the next three years. He has now made it, and I don’t know if there was actually much faking involved.

“You win some, you lose more.” by my favorite Paige in the whole world. She is now ready to kill me, because this isn’t her actual life motto. But you may hear her say it every once in a while as a joke. Her real life motto is, “For His glory and my joy.” Borrowed from John Piper, we’ve now moved into the more godly realm. She really does live her life this way, though, to the best of her ability. It’s inspiring to me every day.

“Where you invest your love, you invest your life.” by my best friend Mary Griffith. Also a borrowed quote, from the band-craze-for-a-good-reason Mumford and Sons, this one rings so true. She’s practicing that daily. We all are, really. If we invest our love in ourselves, we invest our lives in ourselves, which proves empty. If we invest our love in the Lord, we will reap what we sow. A lot of times that looks like investing our love in other people, that they might know the truth.

“Perspective is everything; God is good.” by the aforementioned Christine Kaufman. I love, love, love this one. Chew on that all day. Perspective is everything absolutely. Attitude can be a choice. And when you know and trust and believe that God is good, there is always beauty rising from the ashes. Always. God is always good, so life is never hopeless.

I cannot currently remember Katie Crosby’s because it’s long and inspiring and borrowed from a catechism maybe, but just know that it’s good. And godly. Like her. I’ll take this opportunity and say she’s a person I feel so privileged to have spent some time with so far this year.

Why do I only have girls’ life mottos on here besides Jonathan? Maybe I just haven’t asked the males I know. Or maybe they don’t buy into it as much. Mistake. You should think on your life motto. I always want to hear other people’s if they have one.

A few suggestions if you’re struggling for one -

“No pain, no gain.” Good for work-out nuts and discipline freaks.

“Hey, it’ll make a good story some day.” To be used with discretion.

“No risk, no reward.” For all you dreamers.

“Hakuna Matata.” Ohh, Timon, you are so wise.

“It’s better to be hated for who I really am, then loved for who I am not.” A-freakin-men.

Why did I write this silly blog post? Refer to the title. Works every time.

I Have a New Heart

2010-10-26T11:06:00.000-07:00

I have a new heart. I know it. I know it because of what I just wrote in my journal -

‘I have died to the law so that I might live for God!’ I want to stop trying to follow the rules. Figuring out what’s wise. Figuring out what’s best. What’s best for me. What’s best for them. Blah blah blah. I want to live for God! All of those things are good, but I have so much trouble making decisions. I want to live for God. I want to please Him with every decision. My heart’s desire is to love Him and love people - the new heart that He has given me anyway.

I am so incredibly selfish in my flesh. I found myself trying to explain that to a friend the other day. I really am, more than most people I think. When I got the chance to love and help a woman in need a few weeks ago, I had to battle selfishness at every turn. Every time I chose to continue to love her, I knew it was only because of Jesus. I could rejoice at selflessness knowing, "This is what my Savior has done for me." And as I laid down on the couch that night, I found myself telling the Lord, "I'm putting all my eggs in Your basket! I am fully banking on that You are who You say You are, or this is foolish. Foolish because I'm putting all my natural selfishness aside."

My flesh's heart wants to do what's best for me. That looks like taking control of how I use my time - to make sure I get everything done the way I want it and look successful. But I'm beginning to give that up. I'm starting to see the beauty in process and taking things slow and doing what's best for other people. I haven't even come close to accomplishing it. But I have a new heart, and so I know that it's possible. And life is more beautiful that way. Giving my life away. Not living in fear. Being selfless. Letting go of everything I thought I knew and living for God.

This might sound like a radical transition. Maybe it is, or maybe it's not changing the 'what' but just the 'why.' In other words, maybe it's not changing everything I do, but the heart behind it. I want the heart behind why I do things to always be the new heart I have been given and not my natural, sinful one. Does that make sense?

Call me out on it if you think I'm not following through with what I say. Tell me if you think I'm making/not making decisions out of fear. Tell me how you think I can be freer. Iron truly does sharpen iron, right?

Make Him Known

2010-10-12T21:14:00.000-07:00

Take a moment and read from me something I wrote on July 21, 2009. I was in Florence, Italy at the time:

I exist to know God and make Him known.

To love God and make known His love.

To enjoy God and make known His joy.

To praise God and make known his glory.

To trust God and make known his trustworthiness.

To listen to God and make known His voice.

To see God and make known His hands.

To wrestle with God and make known His infallibility.

To rest with God and make known His rest.

To go to Heaven with God and make known the path.

I love all of those, really, but tonight especially "wrestling with God and making known His infallibility" sticks out. Hallelujah to a God who is real and can stand against any test, any argument. I'm a natural doubter. Bummer. But His infallibility has shown through to me over and over again. And I'll probably question Him again tomorrow. But He loves me and is gracious enough to show Himself to me as I ask.

We exist for Him. And it's better than existing for ourselves. More painful in the short run, but much more grandiose in the long run. I love it.

A few things.

2010-09-27T19:55:00.001-07:00

Three things I know for sure.

We, as a human race, are incredibly selfish.

We are also unattractively prideful.

And we are terribly, terribly insecure.

Three more things I know as fact.

We, as a human race, love fiercely. Unfortunately that love is usually directed towards ourselves.

We highly value safety. Highly.

We will protect our individual rights to the death. Shared life is negligible.

Yet three more things I know without a doubt.

There is hope to be free from the knowledge and facts above.

We were created to give our lives away.

Love and grace make this life beautiful.

Ohhh, McDonalds

2010-09-15T09:06:00.000-07:00

So I went to McDonalds yesterday on a break during my eight hour cleaning day. As I was pulling into a parking spot at approx 3 PM, I began to think. "Oh gosh, I haven't really spent time with the Lord today. Dang. I feel bad. He's upset." But then I realized - I've been working hard all day and I'm really excited to sit for over an hour and spend time with Him. And that's when it hit me ... He is right here, ready to give me peace, rest and joy in His presence. He is pleased that I am working hard and trying to give love and grace to people. And He is here - in humility and grace and love and majesty - ready to receive me. And I tear'ed up in thankfulness for His love and grace to me. How beautiful He is. And I saw His beauty all around me in McDonalds. Two girls happily spending time with a third that had down syndrome. An elderly husband and wife sharing fast food together. A grandmother telling an animated story to her grandson. How beautiful grace and mercy overflowing from love is. It is possible in this life because He showed them first.

And if God doesn't live in Colorado

2010-09-05T10:31:00.000-07:00

Since it's been so long since I've blogged, I feel intimidated by writing an entry. I want to write something inspiring or incredibly life-changing that's happened to me over the last few months. Everything I'm learning these days is so personal it's hard to write about. So I'll try to write a little blurb about my time in Colorado, then be more consistent in writing as I'm learning over the next few months ....

My summer began on an epic two week road trip with three of my best friends. We made a circle around the country - 8,000 miles in 15 days. Two things I took away: This country is beautiful (especially the West) and so are my friends. I adore them.

Then in St. Louis, I hopped in the car with Beka and Thiel and turned back to the West towards Colorado. We arrived May 24th. In exactly my style, I did not mentally prepare for the summer on the Ranch (www.vistaverde.com) nor really have any idea what I was getting into. It started with a two week orientation with our fifty staff - learning my specific job (housekeeping!), learning how to run a hospitality business, and becoming best friends with the other staff. I was riding horses, mountain biking, hiking and eating gourmet food in my off-time. And I am pretty sure that outside of the Amazon Jungle, this was the most beautiful place I have ever been. God is so stinkin' creative.

I learned a LOT about hard work this summer. We worked 9-hour days on average, 6 days a week. Not just physical labor, but the job of entertaining, too. Our off days were not Sundays - that was our busiest day, turning over the ranch for the next guests. It made me realize (surprise, surprise) that if you really want to be good at something, you have to work hard at it. There are no shortcuts that lead to perfection, and that's what our job was all about. It made me realize I want to become an expert at something. That takes hard work, like possibly grad school, but I'm now ready to work for it. I don't want to just be average. And not just so I can boast at how good I am at a skill, but so I can gain credibility among men/women to speak into their lives and actually help them. If that means becoming an expert agriculturalist so I can go to third-world countries and help them develop skills and teach them about God, I will. If that means becoming an expert counselor, researching and studying and helping people become whole so that they can see Jesus, I will. There's a lot to be learned from hard, blue-collar work every day. Calvin, from Calvin and Hobbes, once said, "I say, if your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life." Mine was more like chemical stains on my bruised knees, but I still learned the lesson.

I spent the summer with four amazing women. We laughed together, we ate together, we got angry together, we cried together, we studied the Bible together, we danced together, and we sang together. I learned so much from each one of them. One of them taught me that literally everything can be funny. One taught me about being passionate. One taught me how to be goofy and wise at the same time. One taught me about really giving to other people. It was yet another reminder that community is what makes life possible. I could not have survived the summer literally or spiritually without them. And we were all so different. I love that! We learned lessons together about following leadership that is sometimes difficult. I think I learned about loving an enemy, really, for the first time this summer. I won't write too much about it here, but I'm always willing to share personally.

You should go work on a ranch. It may be the hardest thing you ever do. It may be the most fun and adventurous, too. I adored it. And now, I'm back in Athens - a city I will love forever. I'll write more about that soon.

Rach

See ya college

2010-05-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

Sometimes nostalgia hits in stages. It really started a year ago when I took my final exam as a junior. Senior year had officially started - the beginning of the end. Then came the last first day of class. Then the last first football game. The last last football game. The last fall semester. The last Christmas break. The last Spring Break. Then there was the day our 100 day countdown began, which today marked the end. A few days ago I went to my last class of college. Then we opened our freshman year time capsule. Then came the day I took my last final. And today after commencement, I become a college alumnus.

Everyone always says that college is a special time, and everyone is right.

If I could sum up the last four years of my life in one word, it would be Love. An odd summary, perhaps, but the best one that comes to mind. I had no idea what I was getting into when I moved to Athens four years ago. But the Lord knew exactly what He was doing. He introduced me to Liz and Anna very quickly, girls to whom I credit saving my life freshman year. Then there was Tim and Jeff, two amazing guys who kept us laughing till 3 AM every night.

I came to college not really knowing who I was. Sometimes I wonder if in four years, I'll think the same thing about present me. But I have learned a ton. The friendships I gained have become the hardest, and yet most joyful and precious thing I possess. Jesus became real to me, and I know that He's alive. I have danced, I have climbed, I have road tripped, I have taken tests, I have written papers, I have laughed till I cried with my roommates, I have felt alive and free. And it only gets more so every day.

It's basically impossible to put college into words. But I thank the Lord every day for the way He planned it. I am absolutely and undeservedly blessed.

So why do I write this? I guess my purpose is, as with all things, to give the glory to Him. I have had an incredible, incredible four years. Hallelujah to Him. John 10:10. He came so that we may have life and have it to the full. Amen. I am loved. I am loved. I am loved. So bring on life after college - I think it will be even sweeter than now. If He is there, I want to be there.

See ya UGA. It's been real.

And again I say, Rejoice.

2010-03-30T09:03:00.001-07:00

Hope is real.
Joy is real.
Forgiveness is real.
Restoration is real.
His faithfulness is real.

He really is a God who puts broken things back together.

I've been learning a lot recently, so much that I feel as though I could fill a hundred pages with it.

But what I feel most today is rejoicing with a friend who has so many reasons to rejoice. You should read her last blog post. For real -

The Art of Being Brave

Tell me our God isn't one who saves. I want the world to know Jesus reigns.

I'll write again soon.

Reflection

2010-03-01T20:33:00.000-08:00

A couple people have commented on me not blogging recently. I always hesitate to write after that, because I want to make sure I actually have something to say. But alas I think I do, so here goes.

I was staring at the full moon last night in wonder. In case you don't know, the sky is my favorite of all God's creation. Utterly breathtaking. But last night, I was imaging what it would be like if I knew nothing about the moon.

Let me explain. The light coming from the full moon was so bright that in a field that would have otherwise been pitch black, we could see everything. My face practically shone in the moonlight. And then I thought, if I didn't know that the moon was made of rock (slash cheese) and therefore incapable of shining on its own, I would think it was producing its own light. However, thanks to a fantastic UGA education for the past three and a half years, I know the moon only reflects the sun's light.

Naturally, I extended this metaphor to myself. Some might say that I am a friendly, kind, genuine, positive person (but ask my roommates). They may see a "light" about me. The thing is, that light's not mine. Anything that's good, or light in me was either created by God or has been redeemed by Him.

I am like the moon; I am nothing too spectacular. Just made up of a bunch of dust, and only if the Lord shines on me can I shine at all. I've heard humans called glory-coated dust and I like that. I am unique, and I serve a purpose, but I have no light of my own. Now, the more I open myself up to His Spirit in me the brighter I become - more like a full moon. And maybe the earth is like the sin that stands in the way of me being a full moon all the time. Or maybe I just took it too far.

But back to what's really important - if no one knows anything about me or the God of this Universe, they might not realize the light is not mine. They'll praise me for being friendly and forgiving when really they should praise Him for anything and everything good. I used to be afraid of accepting compliments for this reason, but now I just want to say "glory to Him" every time.

More than that, though, I want to boast in my weaknesses, my dusty dustiness. Trust me, I have a ton. Ask my roommates. I hurt people; I'm selfish; I'm forever prideful. I'd rather people know so that instead of building me up in their heads, they recognize the Holy God. Nothing good I do is of my own accord. And most of the time lately, I don't feel like I'm doing anything good at all. I feel stuck in a lunar eclipse.

But praise be to the One who mercifully shines on us even when we don't deserve it. So even if right now when all seems confusing I'm still producing a sliver of light, I know where it comes from. May we be willing to share why we reflect that light and that none of it is self-produced. Not one kilowatt. Dust cannot shine unless shone upon.

These lyrics by Jaime Jamgochian say perfectly what I'm trying to say:

Jesus, Light of the world
Shine on us, shine on us
Word of Life, spoken for all
Breathe on us, breathe on us
God's beating heart, live through us
Word of God, King Jesus

I am like the moon. I have no light of my own; I merely reflect the Sonlight.

Real Problem, Bad Solution

2010-01-19T14:06:00.000-08:00

"Guarding your heart" is a bad solution to a real problem.

If the Fall had never happened, we would have no reason to guard our hearts. We could trust our hearts to be completely taken care of by everyone because it would be perfect. But, the Fall is a reality. The problem is that we don't take care of each other's hearts because of sin - we're insecure, prideful, selfish, jealous, etc. We hurt each other. The best solution would be for everyone to take care of each other's hearts perfectly, but we cannot. Sin keeps us from that. So the only other solution is to "guard our heart" against others so that they can't destroy us. The only person we can trust fully is the Lord. He takes care of our hearts completely, although sometimes that's hard to see --- because sin gets in the way. Think about it - if we loved each other perfectly, boundaries wouldn't need to exist. We could keep our hearts completely open. Although it makes me question would we still love God the most. But His glory so far outweighs ours, even when we will be perfect in Heaven, that I don't think that would be a problem. He is our Savior. So yes, guarding your heart sucks, but I don't know what other solution there is in a world of heartache.

This is a short post, but I want to hear your thoughts ... ?

The Right Question

2009-10-22T20:44:00.000-07:00

Just the other night I sat at Trappeze and talked with a girl for an hour about our class presentation for the next day. The presentation was on a book of Native American Philosophy and specifically an argument against Western Christian thought. We're both pastor's kids, which is funny, but she has taken a very different path of belief than I have.

While driving home from downtown, I found myself wondering, "Jesus YOU are the light of the world. Did she see that? Does she like me? Did she think I was intelligent?"

Then I realized those last two questions are bad questions. Whether or not she likes me is actually negligible. It won't win her to Christ and really only serves the purpose of making me feel better about myself.

Then I asked myself, "Did she feel loved by me?" That felt like the right question. Her liking me is about me, but her feeling loved makes it about her. I don't care if she thinks I'm cool (Well, my flesh does, but it really shouldn't matter).

I've heard before, "People won't remember what you said to them, but they will always remember how you made them feel."

I want people to walk away from me feeling loved - always.

To be honest, I feel like you have to give up cool points to do that. It means never cutting anyone down or making jokes at their expense. It means making the conversation about the other person. It means complementing and encouraging; giving up pride and beating insecurity.

I probably won't get it right every time, but I know it's the right question to ask and action to take. Challenge me on it.

Ya Know?

2009-09-13T13:59:00.000-07:00

Who has time to blog these days?

My thoughts are soon to come if my life ever slows down .....

Involuntary Rerouting

2009-07-30T08:15:00.001-07:00

Home from the travels. 7 cities in 14 days. Oh baby.

I'll give a highlight (or two) of each one:
Belfast - Protestant Parade. Me, "Are we here on a national holiday?". Catholic hotel concierge, "I don't get it and I don't care." Alright then. There's a crazy history there.
Galway - Cliffs of Insanity aka Cliffs of Moher. That's pronounced mo'hair. But really. It was beautiful. Oh and GILZEAN. So glad he came :)
Dublin - Harry Potter 6. Yeah Ron. And I'll be transferring to Trinity College soon.

Rome - My favorite city by far. Everything was incredible, but St. Peter's Basillica stunned me.
Florence - Sunset at Piazza Micheangelo overlooking the city. And David, of course.
Venice - Aimlessly wandering through the narrow cobblestone streets that dead end into water. Bliss.
Cortona - Anna and Brit's (and all the students) art exhibition. And the endless hours of conversation over cappuccino and gelato.

Then when we got to the airport to go home, we found out they overbooked our flight and we didn't make it on. We got a flight coupon for a direct Delta flight the next day. The reason stated on the ticket? "Involuntary Rerouting." Hah. Yeah, I'd say. I could write out all the clever lessons me and Paige decided we could learn from that phrase, but really I want to write out my thoughts from St. Peter's Basillica. Sorry it took me so long to get to the point. Good writers are only supposed to focus on one subject at a time. Whoops.

Standing in Vatican City with our tour guide, she prepared us for what we would see inside the Church. She promised we would step in and say, wow. Usually when people tell me that my immediate reaction is, well now I probably won't. But walking in, I laughed out loud because the only word that would come to my mind was wow. I don't know how to describe it. I could have stared at the infinite amount of intricate sculptures and the majestic golden linings on the walls for hours. Everything in there was precious, and I don't mean cute. I mean cherished, treasured. Everything had meaning. There wasn't a stone laid by accident. And we were in the Eternal City.

After walking around, I just stood up against one of the pillars, lisening to the voices of a choir singing as Mass began. Wondering at the majesty of it all, I started to think about how I could never create a place like that. I have neither the skill, power nor money. I cannot offer the Lord anything that majestic. We could sit around and debate all day whether or not the Basillica actually honors Him, but my point is that even if I wanted to, I could not in that way.

What I have to offer is my life, my heart. I want my heart to be decorated as preciously, gloriously and purposefully for Him. I want to dedicate and decorate my life beautifully and thoughtfully for Jesus. It takes time. I can't take the easy road and shortcuts as I love to do in every class I've ever taken. It means sanctification, allowing my sins to be revealed and truly turning away from them. I want my life to be a masterpiece for Jesus. I have to develop the skill of having my life glorify Him. It won't be easy, and it will only be by His grace and Spirit.

Bring it on, senior year.

A Letter

2009-07-07T21:42:00.000-07:00

Dear God,

I feel like I'm missing out on what's going on in Your Kingdom right now. And it's my fault. What's the matter with me? Is it because I feel as though I don't need you? Following You is really hard in America, where because we're free it's 'easy.' When does loving your family become a bad thing? It's the only thing stopping me from moving away and being a missionary. And do I really love them? Not enough to ask the hard questions, or to give the sometimes hurtful truth. I know what I should do constantly and then don't. I'm so weak. Again, I want to blame it on America and not really 'needing' You at all times, but the truth is, it's my sinful heart. My sinful heart wants to be lazy and not have to work hard at a relationship. 'You want me to do what???' I ask. 'But I already had to confess that lie and ask for forgiveness for that hurtful thing I said. I have to do it again?' I don't want to. I just don't want to, because I love comfort more than I love You. And until I decide otherwise, I will sit in misery. I will constantly know I am missing out on Your movement and Kingdom on this earth that I have loved being a part of this past year. I have so much room to grow. God, I have so much to learn. I am stinkin' worthless without You. My pride shows up in the craziest places. Sometimes I disguise it as 'self-respect' but I almost wish I didn't have any right now. It disgusts You; I know it does. Like how I don't want to post this letter to You for anyone else to read, but because of that I must. You are the only Love that has broken through my pride -- please continue to do so. My only plea can be for You to open my eyes even more to your crazy Love. Your crazy, sacrificial, perfect, romantic, words-can't-even-describe, Heavenly, dying love that I will never be able to fully grasp or give. That is what will break me down once again. Break me down into a radical for You who can't wait to get back to spend more time with You. Teach me what I know I'm missing. Show me Your Kingdom. Show me Your love, though I don't deserve it. I am miserable without it.

Adonai

2009-06-23T18:11:00.000-07:00

I think in our American selfishness we tend to focus on Romans 8:28, which tell us that God works all things together for our good. So when things don't seem to be working for our good, we get mad. But what does it mean for all things to work together for our good?

John Piper might shed a little light on the subject. He talks about how God is actually for Himself .. for us. He knows He is best for us, that His glory is the ultimate, and that He is completely love. Therefore, He is for Himself, but that is really what's best for us. Here's the link to the transcript of his sermon: Is God For Us or For Himself?

I think when we decide to follow Christ we should consider more Matthew 16:24-25, "If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."

Deny myself. Ouch. Give up my plans for my life in trust that He will do me one better. Stop thinking about my needs and trusting Him to meet them. Not thinking of my time as my own, ever. I trust His character more than I trust mine, but that doesn't make it much less painful.

This life is not about me. Period. It's about Him. How do I fit into the story?

What do you think? I'm curious.

For the Least of These

2009-06-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

There's a Christian bookstore in Athens. After 3 years of wondering why there wasn't one, I found it yesterday. It's on Chase Street of Prince Ave and it's called the Carpenter's Shop. You should go. It has everything you could ever want.

I found a book there about world hunger. Semi-scoffing at the idea the author has of solving world hunger, I opened to the middle and began reading on the page that just so happened to be about this man's encounter with Mother Teresa. He went to visit her, and the very first thing she did was take his hand. She grabbed his fingers and as she pushed them down one by one, she said, "Remember this - 'for...the...least...of...these.'" One word for each finger. I don't think I'll ever forget it. And her words are backed up by the testimony of her life. The author commented that more than anything, Mother Teresa showed her love by touching the 'untouchable' and unwanted people. He said their faces lit up when she entered the room. I want to be that. Mother Teresa was poor. Ordinary. Yet her love for people through Jesus drove her to do what she did. There are most likely others who are doing the same thing but don't get the recognition from this world, but Jesus sees it. I want that.

Her advice to him: "Go out and love the people who are near you." That's all she was doing. That's what this world needs. There are people in every neighborhood, in every city, around every corner who need love. It's ordinary, and yet, it makes all the difference in the world.

I remembered another Mother Teresa quote I read last summer that shapes the way I act and think: 'We claim a loving, forgiving, humble God, but are we the living proof?' To be that for even 5 people in this world, that is enough. To be that for even 1 person maybe. For the least of these. In a way, we're all a least of these.

Fruit Loops

2009-06-10T19:57:00.000-07:00

Wesley rocked house tonight.

The speaker guy man talked about a lot of great things that I needed to hear. What I want to write about and expand my thoughts on is the subject of a tree bearing fruit.

Jesus says as a tree bears fruit, so we will bear fruit when we become His children. John 15:1-5, He is the vine and we are the branches. No one can bear fruit apart from Him.

But the guy man brought up a really good point - trees don't struggle to bear fruit. They just ... do it. It's what trees do. Trees bear fruit, no questions asked. So why shouldn't it be the same with us, those of us who are God's children?

I feel like I struggle with this daily. I constantly second guess myself on whether or not I'm doing the right thing or if I should've hung out with that other person or gone to that other thing. I always wonder if I'm making a difference and feel as though I am not. I don't talk about Jesus to people as much as I wish I did.

But it shouldn't be a struggle. A relationship with Jesus is somewhat a struggle, because it's a relationship with an unseen God, and every relationship takes work no matter what. But bearing fruit should not be a struggle. It should be a natural part of who I am as redeemed.

So taking a look at my daily life, I am most certainly trying to live for Jesus. I try to make decisions based on what will bring Him the most glory. Am I achieving those things? Am I bearing fruit? I think it's a good question for anyone to ask. And if the answer is no, then why not? Is it because we're trying to bear fruit on our own when really the only way is when we're intimately connected with the vine?

And then I hear the words of guy man one more time. Jesus really likes you. He loves you. If I'm going to say it to other people, I must believe it for myself. He likes me. Does He like what I'm doing? I sure hope so. I continue to ask for leading, although many times it seems silent. We can never go wrong when we give our lives for others, since according to 1 John 2 we ought to walk in the way Jesus did.

But now I'm just rambling. Oh, to walk in the way Jesus did. Bearing fruit. Giving our lives unto death. Ouch.

It's an Honor

2009-05-16T22:14:00.000-07:00

So I watched a video of a woman speaking of the Gospel as she was dying of terminal cancer. She said plenty of people have asked her, "Why is God allowing this happen to you?" She tells people that's the wrong question. And then she said, "If one person meets Jesus because of my disease and my testimony, then I am honored to suffer in this way for His glory." I mean ........ come on. She's receiving a Kingdom unshakable.

During her talk, she also said she doesn't worry about what people think of her, because, "No matter how poorly you think of me, I know that I am worse." That's not a put-down of herself or calling herself worthless, that's an acknowledgment in humility that she is nothing without her Savior. So good.

She also made a striking quote about her sickness, that "God withholds in His wisdom what He could do in His power."

Read that again. Does she trust Jesus or what. But every time she spoke of her disease, she constantly said, "Bar a miracle, I will die in 6-8 weeks." I wonder if she's praying for one. I hope she is, because He can most definitely heal her. But her above quote, about wisdom in power, speaks to me.

So Maymester has been different so far. So many less people in Athens. I miss everyone who's gone. But I know this is where Jesus wants me, and better is one day in His courts than thousands elsewhere. So here I sit alone in Club Fitty ... content. Trying to trust as Rachel Barkley, the woman I mentioned above, does. Pray for me if you think of it, for whatever comes to mind. I'm pumped to see what adventures come in His name.

If one person meets Jesus because I stayed in Athens this summer, then I am honored to stay.

Religious Rhetoric

2009-04-29T13:22:00.000-07:00

This was a reaction to an article I wrote for class! Just thought it was interesting ...


Christianity claims absolute truth. This is offensive to people, but
this is how I look at it: If there really is absolute truth (aka Jesus
really is God and He really is the only way to Heaven) then it doesn’t
matter if it’s offensive, it’s true, and the people who have found it
should proclaim it.

Lessl does seem to have a problem with the “politics” surrounding
Christianity. So do I. What he maybe needs to see is the reasoning
behind it. The story of Christianity is that there is a perfect, loving
God who came to save his sinful creation that was deceived by Satan and
their own pride. There are probably a thousand questions that come to
everyone’s mind as you read that sentence; I’ve asked them all before.
So now it’s God’s sinful creation (although redeemed and forgiven) that
has become the church. Sinful is the key word. Messed up. Imperfect.
Therefore, the church reflects that. That doesn’t make OK when the
church does wrong, but that is why it is happening. People should look
at Jesus more and the church less, because we (the church) unfortunately do not
always reflect who He is and what He stands for.

I, like Philip, am upset at the fact people separate Christianity and
science. If Christians are right (or anyone who believes in a God), and
God created the universe, it should not contradict science. It would
not. It cannot..... I understand the Big Bang Theory and reject it. To
me, it’s just as crazy that “something came from nothing” as it is that
a supreme being God created the universe. There are a lot of scientists
who believe in intelligent design (note the Ben Stein documentary:
http://www.expelledthemovie.com). There are brilliant men and women who
believe in creation AND evolution, so now we must decide which we
believe. We should test both. They cannot both be right.

Again I want to point out something that Philip said - Republican does
not equal Christian. Jesus was not a Republican. Jesus was certainly
conservative in his teaching, but really for Him it was a heart issue. I
know just as many awful Republicans as I do Democrats. Jesus was not for
a political party; He made that pretty clear when he came to earth and
didn’t overthrow the Romans like everyone expected. In my opinion,
according to our Constitution, gay marriage should be allowed and the
Ten Commandments hold no more bearing than any other religion’s
commandments. I have my own thoughts on those two issues, but according
to the Constitution, that’s the way it is. The fact is Jesus doesn’t
care about us following the rules – He wants us to follow Him;
everything else falls into place after that.

Melt My Heart of Stone

2009-04-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

This is long .... just read it .... :)

So, I was sitting in a SPCM rhetoric class of mine on Monday, and we were discussing the Civil Rights Movement and Martin Luther King Jr. A boy made a comment about the Civil Rights Bills that were passed around that time and said, "Here's the thing: you can make the laws, but that doesn't change the fact that people are still racist."

Thinking this was an interesting point, I wrote down in my notes - "Laws can't change people's hearts."

I looked at my paper and thought, Woah. Talk about Biblical implications.

So let's talk about the Old Testament laws. They were set in place by a perfect God. The laws He set up, if followed exactly, would make one perfect. He follows these rules, so to follow them would make us just like Him - perfect.

Well, there are two problems. First of all, none of us follow the law perfectly. Secondly, even if we did, just because we follow the rules doesn't mean we want to follow the rules. Follow me? :) It's just like the Civil Rights Laws - a racist white man may follow them so as not to get in trouble, but he doesn't want to. So then is he blameless?

I think we would all answer no, that at least in his heart he is not blameless, and this is what God says for us. He says even in the Old Testament while God's people were under the law that he desired love and mercy more than sacrifices (one of the laws - Hosea 6:6). It's a heart issue.

That's why in Luke 18:22-29, when a rich ruler came and told Jesus he had followed all the laws, Jesus said he was lacking only one thing. "Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." I think more than focusing on what Jesus asked him to literally do (sell everything and give to the poor .. although that is good!), Jesus was showing that this rich ruler didn't really want to follow God, he was just doing the right thing out of obligation. And let's be real, that guy had sinned in his life. So he needed salvation anyway.

So what we need is a change from the inside out! What those racist white men (or women) need more than the laws is a heart change. Am I right? If their hearts were pure and faultless, there would be no need for the law, because they would already be doing the right thing for the right reason (heart issue!). In a very practical sense, that's why older kids have less rules than younger ones, because they already know to do some things right. You don't have to tell them to "eat your vegetables" or "don't slap Susie" because they already know what to do. They don't need those rules.

There are so many implications I can't write them all. This is why we need Jesus, for we cannot save ourselves. Going back to that parable, after Jesus tells the rich ruler what he needs to do be saved (sell everything .. follow me), the disciples are overwhelmed and say,

"Who, then can be saved?"
Jesus replies, "What is impossible with man is possible with God."

God Himself has made it possible for us to be saved, otherwise it would be impossible - we couldn't even if we tried. Hallelujah, praise the Lord! Thank you, Jesus, for doing what we could not do. He died on the cross for our sins because we cannot be perfect. Talk about amazing grace.

This is also why need the Holy Spirit living inside of us when we are saved ... our natural hearts will always be sinful and never want to follow God! We may "follow the rules" and "be a good person", but deep down we will want to break them.

Read Romans 7. It tells us about how the law was put in place to show us our sin. If the law wasn't there, we wouldn't know it was wrong. But the purpose of the law was never to save us. It was to show us we needed saving.

Mmm, so good. If this makes you wonder about the Old Testament and how people were saved before Jesus, it's a question I've wrestled with, too. This website sheds some light, it's strongly based on Scripture: Old Testament Salvation. Search other commentaries also; this is just some guy's informal interpretation. But if the Bible is true, there is an answer to this question. So go find it! Find all your answers! They're out there.

Unseen, but not Unfelt

2009-04-08T17:33:00.000-07:00

If I couldn't see God, nor could I feel Him, wouldn't it make me crazy to believe God existed?

If you want to get technical, I can see the evidence of God everyday. Love. Wisdom. Mercy. Forgiveness. Joy. I can also see the evidence of evil. Hatred. Injustice. Racism. Pride. The existence of an evil enemy begs the existence of a good God. Creation and all its wonder incites a Creator.

But I have never laid my eyes on God.

There's also the fact that Jesus came to this earth claiming to be God's Son. He performed many miracles during his life. Some people say He rose from the dead. Those people continued to say it, performed many miracles in Jesus' name, and were faithful in saying it even unto death.

I never met him, though.

But I have felt Him. I feel His love. No one can deny me that. You can choose not believe what the Bible says about God and Jesus, but I have felt it. I feel His presence, His love, His truth, His pursuit of me.

1 Peter 1:8-9 "Though you have not seen him, you love him; and though you do not see him now, you are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your soul."

PS. Since it's Easter week, check out the people's lives who were radically changed after they claimed to see Jesus raise from the dead. It's in Acts, among other writings not in the Bible.

Love is a Verb

2009-03-30T17:16:00.000-07:00

"You may not live what you say you believe, but you will live what you believe."

So I was reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan, and I made a cool connection ....

Galatians 5:6, "The only thing that matters is faith expressing itself in love.
The only thing that matters?? Because it's faith that saves us (Romans 10:9-10) and
love fulfills God's law (Romans 13:10).

BUT ... love is not just words.
Love is an action.
I think we all believe that, but here's some proof ----->

1 John 3:18, "Dear children, let us not live with words or tongue but with actions and in truth."
John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave..."
Luke 23 - Jesus died for us.

So, maybe this is where/how faith and works collide?
Faith expressing itself in love. Love as an action.

One more story from Scripture ... Luke 7:36-50. In verse 38, a prostitute proves her love by cleaning Jesus' feet with perfume and wiping them with her hair. In verse 50, Jesus tells her her faith has saved her.

So, our love (actions) prove our faith. They do not save us. But just think ... if God claimed to love us yet did nothing, didn't send Jesus as a way to Heaven, would we believe Him?

Well, He has done everything. What will we do in response?

judge not ... trust as love

2009-03-25T21:55:00.001-07:00

Figuring out your spiritual gifts is one answer to my post below. I would encourage anyone and everyone to do so. I'm still working on mine.

New favorite songs:
When the Saints by Sara Groves
Dead and Gone by TI/Justin Timberlake
Gimme Dat by The Ambassador
By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North
check em outtttttttt

I'm starting to realize that people are very different from me. They make different decisions and say different things every day. But that's okay. That doesn't make them wrong. Who am I to think I know everything? Do I think myself as perfect? Far from it. Hmm. We would probably be better off if we all just left judging to Jesus. (kinda like checking the log in your own eye first ...)

It all goes back to trust. Trusting Him to judge and convict, and really in every area of our lives. Do we really trust the infinite, holy, perfect, omnicient, good, loving, true God we serve or do we act like spoiled children when we don't get our way or feel wronged? Choosing to trust is an act of love from us to Him. I like that. I trust Him more than myself, that's for sure. I'm all screwed up.

So I take what He gives in trust, pray for things, then ask Him to not give me what I want but what I need. And then He answers ........ and then I want Him to leave me alone cause those lessons are hard to learn. Any of that make sense?

Basically, Jesus is good. He's proved it over and over. When will we learn?

oh, maha ......

2009-01-29T09:07:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm going to be sitting in the Omaha airport for like the next 8 hours. Items on the to-do list: homework, read, sit, sleep, eat, read, sit, blog. So here it is.

I've been reading through Luke lately, so that's what's comin - randar thoughts on Luke.

Luke 2:40-52 I'm not going to type this story out, but basically, as a teen Jesus was called WISE because he asked a lot of questions. Jesus, God Himself, asked a lot of questions of the older, wiser Jewish men of the day. For those of us in college .. WE ARE YOUNG! We do not know everything. We need advice if we want to be wise.

Luke 5:5 "'Master,' Simon said, 'We worked hard all last night and didn't catch a thing. But if you say so, I'll let the nets down again.'" This is the definition of insanity!! To do the same thing and expect a different result. But Simon did it ... because Jesus asked him to. Am I willing to do insane things Jesus asks of me? Are you? ((2 Thess. 1:11 "May He give you the power to accomplish all the good things your faith prompts you to do."))

Luke 6:12 "One day soon afterward Jesus went up on a mountain to pray, and he prayed to God all night." Jesus...prayed...all night. Who are we to think we don't need to also? He was God Himself and he prayed all night!! This blows my mind. Maybe I should pray these next 8 hours ....

Luke 6:27-31 " Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give to anyone who asks ... Do to others as you would like them to do to you." This is radical, but very clear. It's the inside-outside-upside-down Kingdom! To love those who do wrong to you. Ouch. So hard.
Luke 6:35-36 "Love your enemies! Do good to them .... then you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for He is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked." Again, ouch.

Luke 7:36-50 I'm not gonna type out all the verses, but it's the beautiful story of Jesus forgiving a very sinful woman. Lots of implications here - she performed a deed (perfume on Jesus' feet) to prove her faith in Him, and she was forgiven. Also, there is no one too sinful to be forgiven by Jesus!

Luke 9:22, 24 "If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me ... But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it." So, how does this apply to us? Obviously it looks different for every single person. What does taking up my cross daily mean? Just living unselfishly? Or is there more?

Kind of a lot ... but Luke is just so good. You should read it! I should go read it. Alright, I'll leave you with this quote from an awesome song, one that really puts into words the way I'm feeling right now ...

But all I really wanted was the One who really won it .. fought death, beat it, gave his life to the public. I love it.

Talents For Sale

2008-12-27T15:28:00.000-08:00

I promised you the story of Jesus. And it will come. But I've realized that such a daunting task has kept me from writing other things, so for now I am going to write about something else.

What is life? Oh, the youthful question. Trying to figure out what exactly I am doing here. Aren't we all?

I've been given talents. We all have. What do we do with them? What is the purpose in them? Back to the age-old question again .. What is the purpose in life?

"To glorify God" we always hear. Okay, how? Disciple. Great. Marry perhaps, have kids, love your family. Great. Tell people about Jesus. So great. But what about working? And the desires to pursue music, art, athletics or academics? What do we do with those?

What are those talents for? They certainly come from the Lord, since He is the Creator. He is the best musician, the greatest artist, the most superb athlete and the smartest academic. And He imparted those to us. Oh, what to do with them. And in the midst of it all - stay humble.

I know I am to use my talents for His glory. How, I am not sure yet. But I suppose He won't let me miss it, if I'm on the watch. One thing I do know is this...

I want to share what my Savior has shared with me.
Where I am talented, that I may teach.
Where I am blessed, to be a blessing.
Since I am loved, to love others.

The Gospel As I See It

2008-10-23T20:35:00.000-07:00

Aren’t there enough things written about the Bible already? What could possibly be so different in what I have to say? Does “As I See It” mean this is going to be my own sketchy interpretation, just taking Scripture and using it how I want to? The answer to the last question is no.

Here’s how I see it: I believe that everything written in the Bible is real. God created the world, there were prophets who prophesied Jesus’ coming, He came, died, paid for our sins and rose again, and now all Christians have the Holy Spirit living inside of them. Woah, slow down. Crazy? Yes. But I am 100% convinced. And not just because I’m some idiot who will fall for anything. It took me a lot of searching to come to this conclusion about Jesus. And I came to it in two ways really:

1. I’ve experienced Him. Not in some spooky encounter but in the still, small ways He usually does. First of all, I have a mother who has loved and served me in a way that meant huge sacrifice for her, and she believes in Jesus. The reason she does what she does is because of Jesus. That speaks volumes to me. Then there’s the specific scriptures have spoken to my heart about things that no one knew I was struggling with. My conscience tells me there is an absolute right and wrong. Creation instills awe in my soul. I see prayers answered (and then I see some unanswered, or as I think of it, I get answered “no,” to be fair). Sometimes I wish He would just come to me tangibly, shake me by the shoulders, and say, “I AM JESUS AND I AM REAL.” But He doesn’t. Nor has any other so-called god done either. So that only leaves me with the option of there being no God, and that just doesn’t make sense in my head at all. So am I crazy for these experiences? I think not, and that is because of reason 2.

2. The Bible tells me Jesus is real. Plain and simple. It follows logic, there is evidence to back up that events in it are real, and it makes sense. Many disagree with me though. That is why I have two reasons to believe and not just one. If I only had the Bible, and no experience with Jesus, I would struggle to believe it. In fact, I was that way for a long time. I wrote a song once with the lyrics, “There is evidence that God exists. I’d be a fool not to accept it. But this man named Jesus, did He die for me? Some say yes, but some say no, how can I be sure?” The Bible tells me the story of Jesus, and it makes sense, but without my experience of Him I don’t think I would believe it. How would it be different from all the other religions that claim to be right like Islam and Judaism and Buddhism?

NOW, I have one more thing to say. Even after reading the Bible and the Gospels, even with having my mother being so wonderful and believing in Jesus, I still struggled with it for a long time. I wanted it to be true. I wanted to believe. But I just couldn’t. Some other lyrics from the song mentioned above are, “Jesus makes this crazy world make sense. My family believes, my friends have been set free. But I’m struggling to believe. Help me to believe, please touch me Jesus.” It was around then that I found the verse Jeremiah 29:13, which says, “If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me” (NLT). Maybe taken a bit out of context, but after I read it, I saw it as a challenge. I said OK, Jesus, if you are real, please prove it to me. If You are real, I should find answers to my tough questions and I should experience You as real. So I asked Him to reveal Himself to me.

And He did.

I was praying one day and simply watched a picture play out in my head of Him coming to me and telling me, “Rachael, you do believe in me. You’ve seen me.” Since then I have seen Him heal a woman of depression, seen people love unconditionally in His name, and felt His love and His scripture come alive. Again, crazy? Maybe. But I can’t deny it. I cannot prove Jesus to you by fact. I do have the Bible though, which helps me know I’m not just basing my faith on feelings alone. But let me reiterate this again in case I haven’t made it perfectly clear yet: HE helped me believe in Him. If you want Jesus to be real, or even if you don’t, I think it’s pretty hard to reason yourself into faith. Although there is reason out there to be found. But if you’re struggling, I dare you to ask Him. I dare you to ask Jesus to prove Himself and then read the Gospels, which are the books Matthew, Mark, Luke and John in the Bible.

God gave me another Scripture while I was doubting. One day I read Hosea 2:14-15 (note: this Scripture was not originally written to me, I get that. But it applied to me when I read it, and it has come true. An all-powerful God can do that) “But then I will win her back once again. I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her there. I will return her vineyards to her and transform the Valley of Trouble into a gateway of hope. She will give herself to me there, as she did long ago when she was young, when I freed her from captivity in Egypt” (NLT). Jesus indeed did transform my Valley of Trouble, my doubt, into a gateway of hope. Jesus is the hope of my life and the hope of the world. Now I have given myself to Him. I know that makes me crazy to some but He is undeniable to me. I don’t go out on a limb for much but I have seen Him and experienced Him and I cannot turn back now!

PS. I’m still relying on Him to continue to increase my faith in Him. It’s human nature to doubt what we cannot see.

PPS. The end to that song, in case you’re curious, goes like this: “I was thinking the other day, how do I know I am saved? But then I saw His face. Hallelujah I have been changed! There is power in His name, and forever I’ll proclaim!”

PPPS. The Gospel Message is simply the story of Jesus. I’ve realized that a lot of people know a little about Jesus, but they don’t really know His whole story. You’ve heard you can’t get into Heaven without Him, but do you know why Christians claim that? You think Christians are all about rules, but did you know those actually don’t matter at all? The Bible is a love story about Jesus. The next post shall be on that – the story of Jesus, why it matters, and what that means about getting into Heaven. For what it’s worth ... this is the way I see it.