Daughter, Bride, Temple.

Just what is an identity?

When you enroll in classes in college, you become a college student. On your wedding day, you take on a new role as a spouse. When you have a child, you become a parent. Maybe you see your identity as "employed" or "unemployed", "friend" or "loner", "reader" or "musician", "introverted" or "extroverted". We label ourselves and give ourselves identities or the outside world does. Some identities you have no control over. When you're born into a family, you immediately become a daughter or son, and perhaps a sibling.

But here’s the real question I want to get at, what does God say about identity? The Bible tells us God has many identities - Father, Counselor, Lord (Master), Savior, etc. So by telling me who He is, in response He tells me who I am. As I took a walk by myself the other night, I thought of three identities He has given me that really change everything. They tell me that He loves me. They tell me I am taken care of. They tell me I am always at home with Him. They tell me I am never alone. Though I may often forget these things, that does not make these identities untrue. They unfold from His trinitarian nature. Let me explain -

1. Because God is my Father, I am His daughter.

John 1:12 But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God,

Galatians 3:26 for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.

Romans 8:15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

2 Corinthians 6:18 and I will be a father to you,
and you shall be sons and daughters to me,
says the Lord Almighty.”

So He provides for me, takes care of me emotionally, and protects me.

2. Because Jesus is my Bridegroom, I am a bride.

Hosea 2:16 “And in that day, declares the Lord, you will call me ‘My Husband,’ and no longer will you call me ‘My Baal.’

Ephesians 5:25-26, 31-32: Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ... “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.

Revelation 19:7-9 Let us rejoice and exult
and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and his Bride has made herself ready;
8 it was granted her to clothe herself
with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.9 And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.”

So He has made an eternal covenant with me, knows me, and loves me passionately.

3. Because the Holy Spirit dwells within me, I am His temple.

Galatians 4:6 And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!”

John 14:26-28a 26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. 28 You heard me say to you, ‘I am going away, and I will come to you.’

1 Corinthians 6:19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

So He is always with me, makes me capable of obeying Him, and brings me peace.

Our God is bigger than we will ever understand; it took him 66 books to explain Himself, what He has done for us, and how He feels about us. He is far more than what I have written above, but He is very much those things above. In the same way, we are far more than what I have written above, but we are very much those things above.

Today I am so thankful that grace upon grace is mine because of God's fullness. I am His daughter, His bride, and His temple. I am protected, loved, and never alone. Though I know I am unworthy of such love, He deems me worthy, so I will choose to revel in the beauty that has become mine.

The Gospel is Everywhere - Sean McConnell

Last night as I sat in the dimly lit Melting Point in Athens surrounded by some wonderful friends, I experienced what I've heard called a gospel moment. What exactly is a gospel moment? I think it's when you become astounded, if only for an instant, by the beauty of God's plan of redemption. When you realize the beauty of God's original intention for His creation. When you encounter something so harmonious, or gracious, or majestic that you are convinced again that God is good. In case a definition of the gospel is needed, here is Webster's definition:

gospel |ˈgäspəl|1 the teaching or revelation of Christ : it is the Church's mission to preach the gospel.• (also gospel truth) a thing that is absolutely true : they say it's sold out, but don't take that as gospel.
And if you want one from Scripture, Romans 1:16; 3:22-24, "For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes - the Jew first and also the Gentile . . . We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who we are. For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard. Yet God, with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins." (I am also not ashamed that this is from the NLT version).
So the gospel, in a nutshell, is that we are declared righteous through Jesus' death and resurrection though we don't deserve it. But the thing is, the gospel really can't be explained in a nutshell. A wise man at my church once said it only takes about 3 chapters in Genesis to realize how screwed up humankind is, and it takes the rest of the 66 books to describe God's love for them. And God has also revealed Himself in every facet of His creation. So as I see the gospel played out on this earth, I want to write about it. Without further adieu - a brief description of my gospel moment with Sean McConnell.


Sean and his pianist walked onstage and began playing the most beautiful song I may have ever heard. I was lost in the experience; I can't even tell you the exact lyrics. It was something about Praise Be to God. But what really spoke to me was the way the melody and harmony blended together. Their voices were enough to melt me. The strum of the guitar mixed with the jazzy piano was mesmerizing. The rhythm of it all kept perfect time. I couldn't help but think that this is what heaven's music will sound like. There was a peace and a harmony in the way it all worked together to create a beautiful sound. Surely this is a reflection of God's intention for creation. Peace, harmony, melody, beauty.
If you compared the world to a mirror, it has been broken (not shattered) by sin, so the reflection of God is cracked and tainted. But it can still be seen. And I am convinced that in the songs of Sean McConnell, a glimpse of who God is shines through. At least that's what happened for me last night.


This video isn't the greatest quality, but this was one of my favorites of his last night: A Prayer You Can Borrow.
More gospel moments to come I'm sure.

Revolutionary Friends.

I just want to say real quick, I have revolutionary friends.

I’ve known this for a couple years now. There was one day I was sitting back and reflecting on the beautiful gift of friendship the Lord has graced me with and it hit me. Not only are my friends wonderful people, they’re going to change things. They’re going to change this world for the better. In many ways they already have.

I looked up the definition of revolution. It reads: ‘a dramatic and wide-reaching change in the way something works or is organized or in people's ideas about it.’ I love that. A dramatic and wide-reaching change. The internet has revolutionized the way people gather information, Facebook has revolutionized the way we communicate and Apple has revolutionized - in their own words - everything. Everything technology anyway.

But I think these people I keep mentioning are going to revolutionize the world in a different way. They’re going to change it in the name of Jesus. They’re going to change it through love. I used to like the mental image of the Lord bringing people at UGA together in Athens for a short period of time to learn from each other and love each other, then literally scattering across the nations to proclaim His name. It’s beginning to happen. They’re spread across Georgia, North Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Louisiana, Colorado, California, Washington, The Gambia, Switzerland, Bolivia. Then there are the friends I know from other walks of life in Fayetteville, Chicago, Virginia, Florida, Indiana, Honduras, Peru, Germany, some soon to be traveling to Columbia and Zambia. They’re taking mission trips to Watoto and Scotland and Israel this summer.

Forgive me if there are places/people I forgot to mention here. And I couldn’t count on my fingers and toes the number of people I still know in this city that are changing it as they die to themselves and live for the King of the Universe, including four beautiful women I share a home with.

Maybe I’m bragging - but I’m bragging on them. Their friendship is a gift to me, not something I’ve earned. And they’re going to shine light in the dark places on this earth in Jesus’ name. I think so highly of them. I’m so thankful for them. And I’m beyond pumped to watch their lives unfold.

Love changes things. Grace makes life beautiful. They’ll be bringing both from the original source to the ends of the earth.

We don't fully understand love.

So, I'm a thinker. I'm not void of emotions; I actually feel a lot. But I am always thinking. Unfortunately, my thoughts are hardly ever linear. For this reason, I have a hard time explaining my thoughts to others, and I have a hard time coming to conclusions. This whole concept that I'm about to write about has been mulling around in my head for weeks, maybe months. Finally, talking this through with Paige the other day helped me organize my thoughts. She does that for me often.

I'm not exactly sure what this idea is supposed to do for you, or for me. Maybe this is just to convince us that His ways really are higher than ours, and His thoughts higher than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9). Maybe it's to help explain this crazy world and how a loving God could be in charge of it all. Heck, maybe I'm wrong about this whole thing. (I told you I was bad about coming to conclusions). But over and over again, I keep coming back to that love is what this world is all about, what our God is all about. So naturally, it's always on my mind ....

We don’t fully understand love.

Here’s why I say this:

We like love from our significant others or friends because it feels good. It’s attractive to us.

We like love from our parents when it’s providing for us. But we don’t like love from our parents when it’s telling us what to do. We rebel against its authority. It doesn’t feel as good when it tells us we’re doing things wrong, even though that’s exactly what parents are commanded to do (Proverbs 22:6).

We want love to always feel good. We mistake love always being affirming and kind for always giving us what we want. That is not love. Love shouldn’t propel us towards selfishness, because selfishness is not best for us. Being loved tempts us to hoard it when it should prompt us to give our lives away to love others.

Romans 13:10 is my favorite definition of love. ‘Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of the law.’ Bam. Since God is love (1 John 4:8), He does no wrong to us. He does not wrong us. And since Jesus fulfilled the requirements of the law for us (because we cannot), He is love. [By the way, the second half of the verse shouldn’t be that shocking, since Jesus Himself said all the commandments could be summed up by loving God and loving people - Matthew 22:37-40. Also check Romans 13:8-9.]

Sometimes, love needs to tell us we’re an idiot. In order to love Job, God needed to put him in his place (Job 38). In order to love Jonah (and the Ninevites), God needed to put him in a whale (Jonah 1:17). He also tells Jonah he’s being a whiner later in the book (Jonah 4). In order to love Joseph, God allowed him to be put in a pit (Genesis 37:23, 50:20). In order to love King David, God punishes him for adultery (2 Samuel 12:7-18). Note that God did not punish him forever; He soon blessed David with another child because He loved him (2 Samuel 12:24-25). In order to love Ruth, God let her first husband die, then later sends her a kinsman-redeemer (Ruth 1:3-4, Ruth 4:13-14). In order to love Paul, God put a thorn in his side (2 Corinthians 12:6-10). In order to love the world, God sacrificed His Son (John 3:16). In that moment, I don’t believe love felt good to God. What a sacrifice - to let His Son suffer so that He could have us, too.

How sweet is it that God’s love encompasses all types. He is our Father (1 John 3:1), and He disciplines those He loves (Hebrews 12:6, Revelation 3:19). He calls Himself our friend - our loyal, constant, encouraging friend (Isaiah 41:8, John 15:13,15). He calls Himself our lover (Hosea 2:16, Song of Solomon) - our intimate, faithful, passionate lover. So He is always for us (Romans 8:28-32), and He does no wrong to us (Romans 13:10); it’s us who doesn’t understand what’s best for us. I heard someone say once that God knows how to love us better than we know how to love ourselves. Our self-love is all about me, and that’s not actually what’s best for us. What’s best for us is making our lives all about the Perfect God of the Universe - in other words, accepting and reflecting His love to the world around us.

And I have to mention my favorite part of the virtue love - it never fails. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:8). Hallelujah. These promises of His love stand forever. Forever. Till the end of time.

We will never love perfectly. I think that’s why we have such a hard time understanding love, because everyone on this earth perverts love in some way, even with the best intentions. But we cannot say that he/she/He does not love me just because it doesn’t feel good at the moment. That is a very shallow understanding of the word love. A lot of times love does feel good, but not always. So will you trust God that He is doing what is best for you - whether it’s rebuking, correcting, encouraging or blessing? He does each of these not to tear us down or make us weak, but to build us up in Himself.

We don’t fully understand love. If we did, we would fully understand God. And who is ready to claim that?

You resonate in the ever-changing me.

My original title for this entire blog was, “It was Jesus but she did not recognize him.” That came from a life-changing moment in my tiny room in Club Fitty when I was begging to hear the Lord’s voice. I didn’t know His voice, or so I thought. John 20:15 came to mind randomly, so not knowing what the verse said, I semi-skeptically looked it up. I was shocked. The title comes from the end of verse 14. He was telling me He was there with me, I just wasn’t recognizing His voice. That day I surely did.

I love that. I would venture to say that Jesus is always right with us, we just fail to recognize him. Maybe we’re not looking. Maybe we are and still can’t seem to find him. But I am 100% confident that when we seek Him, we will eventually find Him, our just and lovely Savior [Jeremiah 29:13, Matthew 7:7]. So don’t give up.

But now I really wanted to change things up on here. You might not care, but this is my little corner of cyberspace and I want to take care of it :) I’m changing the title because I find myself changing in so many ways. Maybe you don’t notice, or haven’t noticed, but I know. So the new title ....

You resonate in the ever-changing me.

Two reasons why:

1. I feel like I’m always changing, and I see it as a positive thing. I look back at the me in high school and wonder who that girl was. I look back at the me a year ago and wonder why any of my roommates liked me. I look back at the me three months ago and feel like I’ve grown ten-fold. I think it has something to do with grace. Okay I’m lying, I know it has everything to do with grace.

You see, there’s something in my personality that always yearns for more. Why would I ever stay the same when I know there is so much more I could be? There’s always something else to learn, to implement, to enjoy. I don’t know why this is, but I always want to be like this. I always want to yearn to know more about the God who created me and loves me and then show the world.

2. Resonate. Mmm, how I love that word. Webster’s definition of this word is to produce or be filled with a deep, full, reverberating sound. There is something so great about this to me. When something resonates with me, it touches my soul. Music can do this, love can do this, emotion can do this, truth can do this. The “You” in my title is Jehovah, the same God yesterday, today and forever. He resonates in the ever-changing me. He is the reason for change. Anything good in me is from Him. He resonates in me because He lives in me, and it is undeserved. Hallelujah.

Yahweh, Yahweh, great is Your glory, You go before me. Oh we sing, holy, holy, Your ways are lovely, so high above me. - Needtobreathe.

This feels right.

Somewhere in the land of cyberspace, my beautiful roommate Christine Kaufman has written a similar blog post. But since I cannot find said blog post, I wanted to write my own thoughts on a subject that has become a buzzword in our household and among friends. You can’t live without it; you must live by it. Without it, your actions seem wayward and meaningless. It’s an explanation for all your actions, or at least it should be. It can help you make major life decisions. It’s a life motto.

Now before you write life mottos off like some sort of new years resolution you never stick to, hear me out. We take these very seriously, as you will soon see. Here’s a taste of a few ....

I’ll start with my own, that only seems fair. If you know me, you may have heard me say this once or a thousand times. “If it feels right, do it.” This is a branch and tiny expansion of my response to the constant question, “Why’d you do that, Rae?” It felt right! Now this statement requires a strong moral compass and ethical values, neither of which I have. I’m kidding - sorta. This life motto is neither godly nor super inspiring. I could’ve chosen the golden rule, something about it being more blessed to give than receive, or live like you’re going to die tomorrow. Whatever. I like mine. I live by it, and it hasn’t failed me yet. Yet. Or has it?

“If you feel it, do it. / Do what you feel.” by the wonderful Katuschka Rakovec. It may seem slightly similar to mine at first glance, but this life motto fully captures who she is. If you feel something, do it. And do it like you feel it! Don’t hide. Don’t be fearful. Show your emotion. Do it big. Be passionate! If you need an example of how to do this, just watch her.

“Fake it till you make it.” by the great and brilliant Jonathan Janos. I really like this one. How many of us feel this way? Like we’re faking it all the time - we’re not that confident in what we’re doing. But if we can make people believe that we are, maybe, just maybe, we’ll make it. You may hate this one. I think it’s hilarious. Jonathan is on his way to Germany to serve us as an engineer in the army for the next three years. He has now made it, and I don’t know if there was actually much faking involved.

“You win some, you lose more.” by my favorite Paige in the whole world. She is now ready to kill me, because this isn’t her actual life motto. But you may hear her say it every once in a while as a joke. Her real life motto is, “For His glory and my joy.” Borrowed from John Piper, we’ve now moved into the more godly realm. She really does live her life this way, though, to the best of her ability. It’s inspiring to me every day.

“Where you invest your love, you invest your life.” by my best friend Mary Griffith. Also a borrowed quote, from the band-craze-for-a-good-reason Mumford and Sons, this one rings so true. She’s practicing that daily. We all are, really. If we invest our love in ourselves, we invest our lives in ourselves, which proves empty. If we invest our love in the Lord, we will reap what we sow. A lot of times that looks like investing our love in other people, that they might know the truth.

“Perspective is everything; God is good.” by the aforementioned Christine Kaufman. I love, love, love this one. Chew on that all day. Perspective is everything absolutely. Attitude can be a choice. And when you know and trust and believe that God is good, there is always beauty rising from the ashes. Always. God is always good, so life is never hopeless.

I cannot currently remember Katie Crosby’s because it’s long and inspiring and borrowed from a catechism maybe, but just know that it’s good. And godly. Like her. I’ll take this opportunity and say she’s a person I feel so privileged to have spent some time with so far this year.

Why do I only have girls’ life mottos on here besides Jonathan? Maybe I just haven’t asked the males I know. Or maybe they don’t buy into it as much. Mistake. You should think on your life motto. I always want to hear other people’s if they have one.

A few suggestions if you’re struggling for one -

“No pain, no gain.” Good for work-out nuts and discipline freaks.

“Hey, it’ll make a good story some day.” To be used with discretion.

“No risk, no reward.” For all you dreamers.

“Hakuna Matata.” Ohh, Timon, you are so wise.

“It’s better to be hated for who I really am, then loved for who I am not.” A-freakin-men.

Why did I write this silly blog post? Refer to the title. Works every time.

I Have a New Heart

I have a new heart. I know it. I know it because of what I just wrote in my journal -

‘I have died to the law so that I might live for God!’ I want to stop trying to follow the rules. Figuring out what’s wise. Figuring out what’s best. What’s best for me. What’s best for them. Blah blah blah. I want to live for God! All of those things are good, but I have so much trouble making decisions. I want to live for God. I want to please Him with every decision. My heart’s desire is to love Him and love people - the new heart that He has given me anyway.

I am so incredibly selfish in my flesh. I found myself trying to explain that to a friend the other day. I really am, more than most people I think. When I got the chance to love and help a woman in need a few weeks ago, I had to battle selfishness at every turn. Every time I chose to continue to love her, I knew it was only because of Jesus. I could rejoice at selflessness knowing, "This is what my Savior has done for me." And as I laid down on the couch that night, I found myself telling the Lord, "I'm putting all my eggs in Your basket! I am fully banking on that You are who You say You are, or this is foolish. Foolish because I'm putting all my natural selfishness aside."

My flesh's heart wants to do what's best for me. That looks like taking control of how I use my time - to make sure I get everything done the way I want it and look successful. But I'm beginning to give that up. I'm starting to see the beauty in process and taking things slow and doing what's best for other people. I haven't even come close to accomplishing it. But I have a new heart, and so I know that it's possible. And life is more beautiful that way. Giving my life away. Not living in fear. Being selfless. Letting go of everything I thought I knew and living for God.

This might sound like a radical transition. Maybe it is, or maybe it's not changing the 'what' but just the 'why.' In other words, maybe it's not changing everything I do, but the heart behind it. I want the heart behind why I do things to always be the new heart I have been given and not my natural, sinful one. Does that make sense?

Call me out on it if you think I'm not following through with what I say. Tell me if you think I'm making/not making decisions out of fear. Tell me how you think I can be freer. Iron truly does sharpen iron, right?